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A Few Jokes (possibly NWS)
http://trackwhores.com/viewtopic.php?f=13&t=968		 Page 1 of 2
Author:  madski [ Thu Oct 21, 2010 10:26 pm ]
Post subject:  A Few Jokes (possibly NWS)
Sitting together on a train, travelling through the Swiss Alps, were a
French guy, an English bloke, a little old Greek lady, and a young blonde
Swiss girl with large breasts.

The Train goes into a dark tunnel and a few seconds later there is the sound
of a loud slap.

When the train emerges from the tunnel, the French guy has a bright red hand
print on his cheek. No one speaks.

The old lady thinks:

The French guy must have groped the blonde in the dark, and she slapped his
cheek.

The blonde Swiss girl thinks:

That French guy must have tried to grope me in the dark, but missed and
fondled the old lady and she slapped his cheek.

The French guy thinks:

That English bloke must have groped the blonde in the dark - she tried to
slap him but missed and got me instead.

And the English bloke thinks:

I can't wait for another tunnel so I can smack that French Bastard again.
Author:  madski [ Thu Oct 21, 2010 10:26 pm ]
Post subject:  Re: A Few Jokes
A young boy went up to his father and asked him, "Dad, what is the difference between potentially and realistically?"

The father thought for a moment, then answered,
"Go ask your mother if she would sleep with Brad Pitt for a million dollars."

"Then ask your sister if she would sleep with Brad Pitt for a million dollars",
and then, ask your brother "if he'd sleep with Brad Pitt for a million dollars. Come back and tell me what you learn from that."

So the boy went to his mother and asked,

"Would you sleep with Brad Pitt for a million dollars?" The mother replied, "Of course I would! We could really use that money to fix up the house and send you kids to a great University!"

The boy then went to his sister and asked, "Would you sleep with Brad Pitt f! or a million dollars?"

The girl replied, "Oh my God! I LOVE Brad Pitt I would sleep with him in a heartbeat, are you nuts?!?!?!"

The boy then went to his brother and asked, "Would you sleep with Brad Pitt for a million dollars?"

"Of course," the brother replied. "Do you know how much a million bucks would buy?"

The boy pondered the answers for a few days, then went back to his dad.

His father asked him, "Did you find out the difference between potentially and realistically?"

The boy replied, "Yes... potentially, you and I are sitting on three million dollars.............. but realistically,...... we're living with two sluts and a queer
Author:  madski [ Thu Oct 21, 2010 10:27 pm ]
Post subject:  Re: A Few Jokes
a Priest, a Pedophile and a Rapist walk into a bar.

He buys himself a drink and says.....




On a school field trip to the Zoo the class was taken to the Tiger enclosure. When they got there the children looked at the Tigers and noticed they all had rings around their necks where the fur was missing.
Little Jonny asked the Zoo Keeper "Why do the Tigers have no fur on their necks?"
The Zoo Keeper replied "We used to control the Tigers with collars. The animals are Predators and the collars were used to control them. We removed them because it was cruel."
"Pfft!" Said little Johnny "The Catholic Church, has been leaving collars on Predators for years
Author:  madski [ Thu Oct 21, 2010 10:28 pm ]
Post subject:  Re: A Few Jokes
A shearer goes into a hotel, where his wife works behind the bar, with a sheep under his arm. He walks up to his wife and says "This is the pig I fuck, when I'm not fucking you." His wife says "That's not a pig, it's a sheep."
He says "I wasn't talking to you."
Author:  madski [ Thu Oct 21, 2010 10:29 pm ]
Post subject:  Re: A Few Jokes (possibly NWS)
I had an interesting experience recently involving an "older" woman I met at a bar. She looked pretty darn HOT for 57. She was drinking quite a bit, and while we were chatting, she came right out and asked me if I'd ever had a "sportsman's double:" A mother and daughter threesome! I said 'no', but she might be able to talk me into it. So she slams back one last drink, wipes her mouth, and looking directly into my eyes, she tells me, "Tonight's your lucky night." So we go back to her place, she clicks on the hall light right as we enter, and she shouts upstairs…."Mom! You still awake?"
Author:  madski [ Thu Oct 21, 2010 10:31 pm ]
Post subject:  Re: A Few Jokes (possibly NWS)
A ventriloquist visiting New Zealand walks into a small village and sees a local sitting on his porch patting his dog. He figures he'll have a little fun, so he says to the Kiwi: "Can I talk to your dog?
Kiwi: "The dog doesn't talk, you stupid git."
Ventriloquist: "Hello dog, how's it going mate?"
Dog: "Doin' all right."
Kiwi: (look of extreme shock)
Ventriloquist: "Is this villager your owner?" (pointing at the villager)
Dog: "Yep"
Ventriloquist: "How does he treat you?"
Dog: "Real good. He walks me twice a day, feeds me great food And takes me to the lake once a week to play."
Kiwi: (look of utter disbelief)
Ventriloquist: "Mind if I talk to your horse?"
Kiwi: "Uh, the horse doesn't talk either....I think."
Ventriloquist: "Hey horse, how's it going?"
Horse: "Cool"
Kiwi: (absolutely dumbfounded)
Ventriloquist: "Is this your owner?" (pointing at the villager)
Horse: "Yep"
Ventriloquist: "How does he treat you?"
Horse: "Pretty good, thanks for asking. He rides me regularly, brushes me down often and keeps me in the barn to protect me from the elements."
Kiwi: (total look of amazement)
Ventriloquist: "Mind if I talk to your sheep?"
Kiwi: (in a panic) "The sheep's a fuckiing liar!!!"
Author:  stevedave [ Thu Oct 21, 2010 10:32 pm ]
Post subject:  Re: A Few Jokes (possibly NWS)
Nice :biglaugh:
Author:  madski [ Thu Oct 21, 2010 10:33 pm ]
Post subject:  Re: A Few Jokes (possibly NWS)
A family is driving behind a garbage truck, when a large dildo flies out of it, and hits their windscreen.
To hide her embarrassment, the mother turns around and says to her your kids, "That was a big insect, wasn't it?"
To which her seven year old son replies, "I'm surprised it could fucking fly with a cock that big!"





A couple are driving along in a blizzard when the husband stops the car, gets out, walks to the front, bends down, returns and sits back in the car.
"What was all that about?" asks his wife. He hands her a small frozen ball.
"This poor little rabbit is frozen stiff" he says. "Stick him between your legs to warm him up 'till we get to a vet."
"But it's disgusting! It's all wet and it fucking stinks" she says, angrily.
"Well, just hold its nose then."
Author:  fubygemoje [ Mon Jul 27, 2020 2:01 am ]
Post subject:  Re: A Few Jokes (possibly NWS)
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Author:  EdwardCordeaux [ Mon Mar 15, 2021 5:52 am ]
Post subject:  Re: A Few Jokes (possibly NWS)
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